• Home
  • About
  • Blog
  • Short Stories
  • Novel
  • Scripts
  • Modelling
  • Archives
  • Categories
  • Archive for the ‘Writing’ Category

    Blurb-tastic


    2012 - 08.05

     

    So I’m having a bit of an argument with the blurb for my YA fantasy novel. And the title. Not to mention with the book itself. But for those so inclined to have a quick look – how am I doing? Do either of these ring for you? Neither? Do they stir any curiosity to read the book? Love to hear your (diplomatically phrased) thoughts!

    MANDALA: PALE, BEYOND THE STARS

    In three words:
    Boy vs Destiny

    In one sentence:
    An orphan boy experiencing the incarceration of his guardian through nightmares must find the man who destroyed his family before the dream-connection kills them both.

    Longer version I:
    Too much destiny is never a good thing, especially when quite a lot of it involves the likely premature death of the destined.

    Such is the burden on Lien, a boy with equal talent for instigating and attracting trouble, when he seeks the aide of a cursed spirit to save a friend, right some wrongs, kick some karmic ass and find out why everything awful ever seems to be his fault anyway.

    Saddle up for a swashbuckling adventure across Altica, a splendid medieval world where the taller the story, the more likely it is to be true. For our intrepid hero might be unprepared for the hazards of the wide and wild world, but not half as unprepared as Altica is for the force of nature that is Lien.

    Longer version II:
    Growing up in a geographically and chronologically unreliable forest can make the unusual seem mundane, but even for teenager Lien, a recurring dream delivered daily by a night mare seems out of the ordinary. Especially when the dream charts the nightmarish dying days of the friend to whom he owes his life.

    Lien’s quest to catch his night mare, ride her back to the source of the dream and save Arete leads him beyond the wild borders of the Leaverness forest. There he discovers the medieval world to which he was born, but peopled by folk who would use him to destroy the ancient, mystical world in which he was raised.

    For in the turbulent city of Avenel, Lien finds that everyone has a different idea of who – or even what – he might – or should – be. There’s an empty throne pointedly missing a teenage heir; a chivalric order which some people are dying to get him into while others would kill to keep him out of; and whispers of war within the city and without, which Lien wants nothing to do with, but seems unable to escape.

    To navigate the mysteries of his past, dangers of his present and ensure he has a future, Lien will have to seek the aide of a force more dangerous yet – Mandala, a possessing spirit that some claim represents justice, but seem closer to an avatar of vengeance. The path to Mandala draws Lien closer to finding Arete, but also to a confrontation with the forces that destroyed his family and will gladly finish the job.

    So it seems that too much destiny is never a good thing, especially when quite a lot of it involves the likely death of the destined. Saddle up for a swashbuckling adventure across Altica, a splendid medieval world where the taller the story, the more likely it is to be true.

    LIEN by Anne-Laure Daviet – http://www.mi-chemin.net/carnet

     

    50 Kisses – Love v Fantasy II mark II…


    2012 - 06.30

    Following yesterday’s draft for the SWF ’50 Kisses’ competition, I have an Edit By Community win! With thanks to all those who wrote with suggestions, I have a completed 2 page entry – similar but tighter, with not one but THREE kisses AND actually to length. Well. Marginally. Oh, and a happier open ending.

    Might have to try this more often. You guys ROCK!

     

    EXT. PARK – DAY
    LEATHER JACKET MAN (LJ MAN) – beautiful in his own right, and wearing an exceptionally beautiful leather jacket – proceeds.

    DONNA (V.O.)
    No. You’ve still lost me. You fell in love with the man – or the jacket?

     

    INT. LOUNGE – NIGHT
    MAGS perches on the arm of a couch, absently plucking the petals of a single red rose. DONNA sits more conventionally, wine glass in hand. On the coffee table, a half-eaten pizza and a flyer for Valentine’s Day Specials.

    MAGS
    Indeed, therein lies the question.

     

    EXT. PARK – DAY

    MAGS cycles past LJ MAN, entranced by his jacket. She slows.

    MAGS (V.O.)
    First: the jacket.

    DONNA (V.O.)
    You stalked him?

    On LJ MAN: MAGS now rides slowly behind, having turned back.

    MAGS (V.O.)
    I was enamoured. What kind of man could wear such a garment? I decided he must be a heroic figure. Lethally genteel. A spy, perhaps -

     

    INT. BAR – DAY

    LJ MAN leans against a bar, suave ala James Bond. Seeing an elegantly dressed MAGS, he pushes aside his martini to take and gently kiss her unresisting hand, his eyes on hers -

     

    INT. FUTURISTIC SETTING

    MAGS (V.O.)
    - or a steampunk space cowboy. The kind who cleans up six kinds or intergalactic vermin before breakfast.

    LJ MAN swaggers in with a stupidly souped up SF gun. Pulls MAGS in by the waist, kisses her extravagantly, while aiming the gun at the camera and FIRING -

     

    EXT. URBAN SETTING

    MAGS (V.O.)
    Or an urban superhero, fighting for justice and… other stuff on the streets of post-apocalyptic London -

    LJ MAN stands back-to-back with a cat-suited MAGS, surrounded by THUGS. They share what might be their last kiss, then draw their respective post-apocalyptic weapons to face their fate -

     

    EXT. PARK – DAY

    MAGS slowly rides past LJ MAN, eyes still glued to the jacket.

    MAGS (V.O.)
    - and then it occurs to me that the jacket might be a maguffin, and I was actually attracted to its wearer.

    DONNA (V.O.)
    Halleluja!

    Completely oblivious to the gate/tree/post/pedestrian she’s about to ride straight into -

     

    INT. LOUNGE – NIGHT

    MAGS
    Only then I fell off my bike.

    DONNA
    And did he chivalrously come to your rescue?

    MAGS plucks the last petal from the rose.

    MAGS
    Alas, no. And what if he had? How could he have possibly lived up to the man I had imagined?

    DONNA
    You realise this says a lot about why you’re still single.

    MAGS looks all secret-squirrel.

     

    EXT. PARK – DAY

    MAGS hauls her bike back upright, dusting herself off. Ahead, LJ MAN pauses, looking to MAGS as though he might turn back.

    She grins. Ready to give this a go anyway.

    50 Kisses – Love-Fail II


    2012 - 06.29

    So the London Screenwriters Festival is ambitiously running a competition to crowd source 50 short films. It’s called ’50 Kisses’, is based around the question of ‘what is love to you?’ and needs to be set on Valentine’s night – all of which make three really strong reasons why I only got around to writing an entry the day before it closes.

    Well, on the penultimate day I confessed on Facebook that I had no idea how to approach this question, and then started something terribly melancholy. Semi-autobiographical, you see, melancholy being a generally accurate emotive state for the vacuum which is my love life.

    Not that the 2 page films had to be about that kind of love – although the Valentine’s night setting probably screwed up a few more original approaches. I had a strange moment on the tube recently. I thought I’d try that on for size.

    2 pages. Set on Valentine’s night. Exploring love. Thoughts welcome.

    EXT. PARK – DAY

    Pedestrians and cyclists pass, going about their business.

    DONNA (V/O)
    No. You’ve still lost me.

    Amongst them weaves the back of LEATHER JACKET MAN (LJ MAN).

    DONNA (V/O)
    You fell in love with the man or the jacket?

    INT. LOUNGE – NIGHT

    MAGS perches on the arm of a couch, absently plucking the petals of a single red rose. DONNA sits more conventionally, wine glass in hand. On the coffee table, a half-eaten pizza and a flyer for Valentine’s Day Specials.

    MAGS
    Therein lies the question. (more…)

    Riding the bell-curve. And finding voice. Possibly at the same time.


    2012 - 06.26

    So I currently have something of a social media Problem, which is to say that I’ve overloaded this website with a number of my interests, not all of which everyone considers complimentary. When I’m feeling vital and bullish I tend to petulantly toss my hair at this and say ‘well it’s all me, and it all intersects, and if you’d rather have me in boxes, you probably don’t actually want me so let’s just clear all that up now before people get upset, shall we?’

    You really don’t want to me see when I’m upset.

    And when I’m feeling less bullish and more broke and vulnerable, I think ‘I should really do something about that,’ a thought inevitably postscripted with the ineffable ‘later’.

    So until I decide What To Do About It, I’m just going to make a point of my holistic theory, however bullheaded, and write blog posts that straddle and connect facets of my life. Which pretty much explains the eloquence of this post’s title.

    It started with Chris Jones/Living Spirit’s first London Breakfast Club event for screenwriters. One of the greatest joys of working as a city Personal Trainer is that I’m now able attend stuff like this, and I am always up for a cooked breakfast. After too many hours in the Box I also tend to crave things like daylight and the company of story geeks who will happily sit down and dismantle films, books and TV series over a plate of burnt and greasy food cooked far beyond any nutritional value.

    The first Breakfast at the Phoenix Artists Club featured the lovely and personable Linda Seger as the guest speaker, talking largely about the difference between Art and Craft, and their impact on Voice. And because I currently spend much of my life in a black and neon underground gym learning not to write fictional stories on the page, but to rewrite/edit the lives of clients who come to me to change their personal stories, my brain started connecting everything Linda said to my new vocation.

    All stories give someone a problem, and the story itself lies in the gap between where that person is, and where they want to be. The writer’s job is to be as creative as possible about crossing that gap.

    All PT clients turn up with a ‘problem’ – be it weight, strength, aesthetic, rehab, they want more energy, general health – and the success of their training program lies in whether it enables them to close the gap between where they are now, and where they want to be. The PT’s job is to be as creative and inspiring as possible about closing that gap.

    As a writer, you have to know what you can bring to the table, Linda says – what you bring that no-one else can.

    As a PT taking on a new vocation and business, I am exploring what it is that I can bring to my clients. What I can bring that no other PT can. (more…)

    Life’s too short not to be Leia: SFX Weekender 3


    2012 - 02.09

    This may require some explanation

    If the geeks do inherit the earth, rejoice my friends, because they know how to throw a damn good party.

    Now since arriving on the fair shores of Albion I’ve been no stranger to the writing, film, TV and comics fan scene, and there is photographic evidence of me prancing around in a wannabe Xena/Angua outfit at Discworld events. But I am telling you true, ain’t nothing I’ve seen could have prepared me for geektasm of an SFX Weekender. Or a Pontins Holiday Park, for that matter.

    Am I talking Swahili? Never heard the word geektasm? Fair enough, I probably made that one up. Put it this way: SFX Magazine hosts an annual Weekender consisting of talks, panels, screenings, merchandise trading, cosplay (costume play, aka legitimate dress-up for adults and yes, that is no euphemism), excessive alcohol, extraordinarily bad food and very little sleep. Walking into the bar at such an event is likely to look like this:

    Drinks, ladies?

    An SFX Weekender is a place where you can run into any character from the varied realms of SF, Fantasy and Horror and the people who created or bought them to life. Where you can be groped by Chewbacca in the bar, run into Paul Cornell in the cafeteria and hear Brian Blessed sing O Sole Mia ala Pavarotti (from about three miles away).

    OH, THE TRAUMA

    It is therefore, in short, strange, surreal and very special.

    (more…)

    Notes to self for LSF


    2011 - 10.28

    So it’s here, the London Screenwriters Festival has arrived and let’s be fair, based on the experiences of the pre-pitching day, there are a few things that I need to remember:

    1. leave the cloppy heels at home if I’m going to continue to be unable to sit for more than 40 mins at a stretch. It’s a challenge, people. 4 days without exercise and there may in fact be casualties. Cloppy heels, meanwhile, really ruin the ninja-ness of my exits (in aide of a brisk walk around the quad to not kill people), and I’m concerned that, in noticing said exits, other delegates may come to believe I suffer an unfortunate degree of incontinence. Or that I have a really awesome secret fourth life that requires constant attention to my mobile. I might pitch more in that direction.

    2. quit swearing like a sailor, or

    2a. develop a broader vocab for said swearing so that at least it’s entertaining if  not educational for other non-mariner folk

    3. not PO anyone else. Not that I knowingly PO’d anyone at the LSF today, but I may just additionally italicise knowingly here as a thinly veiled reference to this week’s amazing aptitude, on a number of fronts, for putting foot in mouth or, worse, foot in other people’s mouths or, worse still, inadvertently causing friends to be kicked in the teeth by other people’s feet and all with the best of intentions.

    That’s me on the left: more wisdom from Neil Gaiman’s Sandman

    5. stop being so massively insecure about EVERYTHING EVER

    6. remember names. Any names. A name. A name a day and that’s a whole four new names. Why can’t everyone put their photos on their damn business cards? Oh wait, is that just me… and speaking of which…

    7.  pluck up the courage to actually conduct the Great Business Card Experiment. Because yes, after Moo bollocked up my business card order – and after all that traumaI redesigned, reprinted, felt smug, and yet after one day in a room of strangers who don’t understand my predisposition to dressing up and waving weaponry around on the weekends, find myself quite paralysed at the idea of handing any of them around.

    This could be a whole new Ninja Fail blog in the making, my friends. Even if I do actually offer or get asked for any cards, will I actually produce them?

    Would you?

    Not a risky PR strategy AT ALL

    Business Card Aaaargh


    2011 - 10.11

    The London Screenwriters Festival is almost upon us, which is an occasion on which  forcing your business card upon people politely offering your business card to every moving body is deemed socially acceptable, if not mandatory. Packs of writers will rally one another to bouts networking courage through little competitions, like who can give out or acquire the most cards.

    Admittedly this usually results in the majority of card exchanges happening between fellow writerly aspirants, which is often less productive than slipping your card into the hand of say an executive, director or producer – who many of us are catastrophically incapable of speaking to in a manner that sells us as intelligent, interesting or even human. But look, we’re a shy bunch, by and large. Baby steps.

    The point of course is that for any exchange of cards to occur, said cards must first exist. Which leads rather neatly to the Aaaaargh at hand.

    Put yourself in the place of a Person of Power attending the Festival (and by this I mean anything from a potential fellow collaborator to an agent who might just think you’re the bomb). You’re going to spend three days being  politely harangued by gangs of quietly terrified writers, desperate to network and be noticed. You’re going to end up with a hand (briefcase and every available pocket) full of business cards and a brain rammed with new names and faces, most of which will remain in a defiant state of disconnect. Or possibly that’s just me. But while first impressions and snatched conversations can be fleeting, those cards will be reliably real and present.

    Photographers, artists, actors and models and their ilk are the lucky ones – they get great cards. You have to be a right muppet to fail on making striking cards for the likes of those professions. But writers? I’m sifting through my collection from a few years back and while some are quirky and cute and occasionally clever, there’s not a whole lot a business card can say about the writer, beyond them being one – contactable by phone, email, website, blog, Facebook, Twitter, Google Plus and hell, here’s even a mail address, cos you’re sure to want that.

    So what do you put on the damn thing?

    (more…)

    Exercise for Writers – part 2


    2011 - 08.05

    Writer?
    Finding it hard to exercise?
    Check out Part 1 of Exercise for Writers, and then do continue…

    Number 3
    Appreciating exercise as a way of exercising the imagination.

    So with No1 and 2, you’re multi-tasking to maximise efficiency of a passive exercise (watching/listening) with an active exercise. But there’s definitely a split in concentration there. Exercise on its own can be exercise for both body and imagination – but that’s when Time (as in ‘I don’t have enough’) and Motivation (as in ‘I don’t have any’) raise their baleful gaze and send many writers slinking back to their desk, and probably their fifth coffee of the day which may very well require the dippage of cookies or complimentary crisps.

    I know the equation. Coffee goes in, writing comes out.

    Now we’ve all experienced the way  familiar activities kind of disengage the conscious brain, often leading to unexpected spurts of creativity – who hasn’t had some astounding flash of genius while doing very rote tasks like the dishes, driving or going to the bathroom? So how about we substitute those things, just for instance, with activities like going for a walk, a run, a swim, a cycle? These are just the sorts of tasks that seem to allow the right side of the brain to take a break from thinking about annoying daily bollocks, disengage a bit and deal with important things. Creative things. And if you want to pimp your creative self to awesomeness, try using thematic music selections or just lightly focusing on a particular plot, character, problem etc, because these are times where you can make surprising leaps of creativity and logic that simply wouldn’t happen sitting at a desk bashing your head against the keyboard.

    So this isn’t exercising while media consuming – it’s using exercise as part of your media creation. It’s about not looking at exercise as an annoying thing you Should Do But Is Really A Big Distraction but looking at exercise as an opportunity to walk around your current project from different angles. To hold the story and characters lightly and allow your mind to play with them while you’re gallivanting around/lapping the pool.

    But: TIME IS THE ENEMY, right? Ok, are there ways to try to built this into your current schedule? Instead of driving or training/tubing to work, can you cycle instead? Lose the aaaargh of transport and get your exercise and mind-space doing something that has to be done anyway (although detaching the mind and cycling in, say, London, can have some serious OH&S implications – said from experience, although that doesn’t stop me). It’s that time where you get to disengage your brain and let Stuff float up. The problems you’re grappling with sometimes solve themselves. Sometimes you discover problems you weren’t even aware of. That might not seem a win at the time, but better sooner than later, eh? And sometimes, as a bonus win, you discover solutions (ok, and problems) via realising the solution to something you didn’t even know was a problem in the first place. Get in.

     

    And finally, more Technical Blah  to consider when re-wiring your attitude towards exercise, to see it as a benefit, not a chore:

    - exercise helps you live longer, strengthens your immune system, improves blood pressure, bone density, metabolic rate and blah blah blah blah blah

    Yeah, I get it. Long term stuff can be hard to prioritise in the ever present here and now. So prioritise this: right here, right now, it helps sharpen concentration and means you can sit and throw shit at that computer screen for longer. It’s probably going to be less shitty shit too if you’ve broken up your day-job-desk-sitting and your writer-desk-sitting.

    It will almost certainly look less like this.

    - you spend your time creating interesting, dynamic, kick ass and inspirational characters, right? So why the hell do you get to be a sedentary slob then? Be a superhero (after all, all superheroes are just normal dudes pretending to be superheroes, whether writing, drawing, acting, reading or watching them). Pimp yourself out. Why do your characters have to do all the work? Pump some iron. Lose some weight. Eat better. Look better. Feel better. Live it. Your job is to imagine you’re other people – it’s not being crazy, it’s being good at what you do. Some days I’m Vandal, some days I’m Sienna, some days I’m Rael, some days I’m Buffy, and occasionally I get a bit carried away and dress up as Xena. Doesn’t hurt anyone and believe me, I feel fiiiiine.

    I do get some odd looks on the train though.

    (more…)

    The ‘E’ word (for writers) – part 1


    2011 - 07.31

    Oh yes, today’s subject is… exercise.

    Yes, for writers.

    Though I’m a fitness professional, I hardly ever talk about the E word by choice – mostly because people seem to want to talk to me about it all the time, generally hoping for magic fixes.

    Go away, there are none.

    Unless you’re Steve Rogers.

    Lucky sod

    But when David Melkevik* asked me for a blog about exercise for writers, I thought: what the hell. Why not? I’m a card-carrying member of that rare and fortunate strain of humans genetically wired view endorphins as the greatest (not to mention cheapest) drug on the market. However after a couple of years of inflicting acts of exercise on people for a living, it has come to my attention that not everyone thinks Exercise Is Fun. But do not despair, my friends, because even if the E word doesn’t rock your day, it can rock your writing.

    (*I met David at the Screen Writers Festival two years ago. We conducted a friendly competition throughout the four days to see who could produce the geekiest t-shirts. In the end, he won both the competition and therefore my continued admiration).

    I understand how exercise becomes either a particularly dirty word or unachievable holy grail for writers who go from a day desk-job to a home desk-job. Where to fit it in? It can be a battle just to find the time to write, much less exercise and write. But consider that not all writing takes place at the desk. If Time is the most commonly cited Enemy of Excercise (politely skirting various versions of the other biggie, ‘I’m a lazy pillock’), how about shifting it from being a competing time pressure to being a complimentary part of the creative process?

    I’ll throw out three ideas to start from. The first is how to slot exercise into your current schedule through multi-tasking. The second is how to slot exercise into your current schedule by advantageous multi-tasking which permits you to be expanding yourself as a writer at the same time. And the third is to simply be determined to slot it in, come hell and high water – and if you’re going to do it that way, the best thing is to at least be aware that there are ways you can still be using that time to aid your writing.

     

    NUMBER 1.
    Slot exercise into your current schedule through multi-tasking.

    DON’T PANIC! Now I realise the dreaded ‘m-t’ word might strike fear into the heart of the men amongst us, but bear with me.

    Is that ACTUALLY Matt Smith? Too much squeeee.

    (more…)

    Writing without a recipe


    2011 - 03.03

    Recipe? Moi?

    Amongst those many people I have lived with, my cooking habits approach the notorious. Alarmingly, these habits have changed very little; Poppy, my best friend through my early teens, once fell victim to my favourite culinary past-time of throwing everything to hand in a blender, a habit I still carry out to this day, the only difference being that I now control what’s in the cupboard and because I dislike shopping even more than I dislike cooking, there are less things to hand to poison oneself and ones friends with.


    It’s a method of cooking I blame my father for. He never followed a recipe if didn’t have to, or even when he did, he considered it a loose guide, like a series of suggestions just waiting to be improved upon. Why make the same boring thing as everyone else when you could make something UNIQUE?!

    What happens when people meet my cooking

    Consequently my attitude towards the kitchen tends to turn out things accurately described as ‘slop’, of which I make and freeze a weekly batch because the idea of preparing food every day literally reduces me to tears. Consequently, the kinds of slop I produce involve a lot of the right ingredients, but combined with no art, no care, no regard for valid rules of culinary practice and so are palatable to myself (with my extremely low standards) only.

    Now thanks to last week’s re-education by Kristen Lamb I spent yesterday under the tuition of Messieurs Gladwin, Snyder and Vogel, taking their respective story beats and laying them down in the context of my book. What I was relieved to discover what that I had most of the right ingredients, just not in the right order and often in flagrant disregard to the valid rules of dramatic practice.

    What I was embarrassed entertained to later realise, determinedly pushing pedals up the royal road with knackered legs that protested every revolution, was that I wrote the first draft of The Sinless Sword with exactly the same technique I approach cooking: taking all the ingredients to hand, throwing them together, and hoping for the best. This yielded the same result as my infamous slop: something made of all the right ingredients, yet palatable only to myself. And right now, that is so freaking obvious.

    Laying out the beats of the book is like running a MOT on the story: checking all the elements are present, accounted for and doing the right thing at the right time, which is where I’ve been failing before.  Previous versions of chapters thrust upon helpful friends have come back with comments generally praising the writing, but absolutely baffled about the story itself. This week, I’ve had two readers actually ‘get’ the book.

    Progress!

    Structure is now officially my bitch. Not my prison, not a generic cookie-cutter that’s going to give me an unoriginal book you’ve read a thousand times before, but a framework that’s going to strengthen my story and allow it to fulfil its promise. If you think I’m slavishly converted here, read this from Kristen about why you are wrong. There are exceptions to all rules, but know the rules first.

    And please don’t think I’ve never looked at it before now with my scripts – I’ve long been a convert to the basic elements. But between the work of Phil Gladwin, Blake Snyder and Christopher Vogler’s translation of Joseph Campbell’s monomyth, I now have 10 pages of outline beaten out with logic, pace and most importantly (at least, I sincerely hope…) resonance. My idea for the end of the book wasn’t translating through my first draft; like the magical taste that makes a dish, it was lost in clumsy, unbalanced chaos of the other ingredients. I have so much work to do from this point, but I am unbelievably excited about doing it because now I’m pretty damn sure the book will work. There are still numerous ways I can screw it up, but it’s now shaping up an awful lot closer to something people will want to read than it was last week.

    [however for my nearest and dearest who might hope this means a transformation in my culinary arts, I’ll just point out that writing to structure is hugely time consuming and I am still the laziest person on the planet when it comes to meals, therefore I fully intend to devote all available time to the book and allow shortcuts to remain in the kitchen…!]

    Awesome references:

    Kristen Lamb’s Warrior Writers Blog

    Phil Gladwin’s Screenwriting Goldmine (available hard copy or electronically incl audio)

    Blake Snyder’s Save the Cat! and Save the Cat! Strikes Back

    Chris Vogler’s The Writer’s Journey: Mythic Structure for Writers